I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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