No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
