Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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