That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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