i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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