I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
