how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
