So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
