Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i think i have herpe
just one?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
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