Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
