He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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