sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Randomize
