my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize