Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
