Soap is not a condiment
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Randomize
