i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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