I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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