I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
