wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
