Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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