i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize