You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Can't talk, ducks in the car
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
