take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
