READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
