i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
