he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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