Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
