So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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