Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
