It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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