I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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