i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
