tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
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