You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
