You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Randomize
