I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
