party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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