I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
