It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
