I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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