the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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