I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
