I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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