Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
