Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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