Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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