He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Randomize
