yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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