Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
