It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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